Tha pit doon

If thur's yin thing tha Ulster-Scots tongue is geared tae, it's tha pit doon. As a rule they hae niver suffered fools gladly nor ir they afeart o pokin fun at thursels.
I herd a guid yin years ago, whun an unfortunate cretter missed tha dart boord an hit tha waa insted. A voice behin mae said,

Thon cretter cudnae hit a barn dure wae a bakeboord.

Ir if thur's nae wean's aboot 
Ye cudnae hit a bull on the erse wae a bakeboord