Yin Mere Clean Shirt

Yin Mere Clean Shirt

Greetin’s oul freens A hope this week fins ye aa weel fer thur’s alocht o' seekness gan roon. Ivery ither cretter ye meet is deein' wi tha cowl. Ay, an Am nae exception. A hae an oul craitle in my breesht a cannae git ridd o'. Fower weeks A hae bin hirslin. Last week A tuk maesel tae tha doctor bit thon antibiotics he gien me micht es weel o' bin smerties fer aa tha guid the’ daen.

Durin' tha day it’s no tae bad bit at nicht Am splooterin an blooterin simthin wile. Ay, wi aa tha weeslin an clocerin gan oan it's a wunner oanyin in tha hoose's gits oany sleep.

Tha ither day tha plooterin' an bloicherin' wus sae fierce that A managed tae pu simthin in ma showlder an noo A hae tae houl maesel lik Ballyhalbert, aa tae tha yin side. An es if aa thon wusnae bad eneuch a hae cum doon wi a quare dose o’ tha cowl forbye. Ma heid's blocked, ma neb's rinnin' an ma thrapple is es reuch es a badgers erse.

Ay, a doot yin mere clean shirt 'ell dae mae. Bit the' say if ye dinnae laugh ye'll cry sae A’ll lee ye wi this oul yin.

Thur wus an oul cretter wha wunt tae tha doctor wi a wile pain in haes richt han.

"Ach doctor," sez he, "A hae a pooerfu sore han. A can herdly clase it."

The doctor asts him tae strip tae haes simmit an gaes him a quare gan iver. Efter haes bin pued an hoaked fae heid tae fit.

The doctor sez, "A hae a cream fer ye that shud sort yer han oot in nae time."

Relieved tha oul boy sez, "A’m gled tae hear it doctor, bit Am wunnerin’ wun tha pain gans, wu’ll a bae fit tae play tha piano?"

"Aff coorse," sez tha doctor. “It’ll bae nae boather tae ye”.

"Am quare an gled tae hear thon," sez tha oul cretter, "fer A cudnae play it befur."